Client: Can you describe what disturbances in sense of self might look or feel like? For some reason this resonates with me and I believe it may be what I experienced from a very young age.
Cedric: Sure, first off, early attachment experiences lay the developmental basis for 1. our most core internal map of close relationships, 2. our ability to emotionally self regulate, 3. our ability to explore, and 4. our self of self.
Disturbances in the sense of self can be multifaceted, for example:
- The sense that I don’t know what I want
- I have no opinions or feel like I only have a very tentative grasp on my opinions and desires
- What I want doesn’t matter
- I lack agency and control over my life
- I don’t feel good about myself (poor self esteem)
- I don’t feel like I can separate myself from others even when that is the right thing to do (enmeshment)
- I can’t make my own decisions
Also dissociation is a disturbance of the sense of self as there are parts of the self that aren’t communicating with each other. Another type of disturbance in the sense of self is just a sense of inner void (a fugue state, a dissociative state). These type of more serious disturbances are associated with disorganized attachment.
If these are issues for you look at this course on developing the Building the Healthy Self.
In this course we will cultivate the "Healthy Adult". This implies 1) developing the capacity to be a secure attachment figure for others, 2) to develop better self definition, 3) self agency, and 4) self esteem.
This course is for those who have already worked through the basic attachment repair courses or who come to this work already secure attachment established. Said differently, this course facilitates positive development beyond basic secure attachment.
In this course we will cultivate the "Healthy Adult". This implies 1) developing the capacity to be a secure attachment figure for others, 2) to develop better self definition, 3) self agency, and 4) self esteem.
This course is for those who have already worked through the basic attachment repair courses or who come to this work already secure attachment established. Said differently, this course facilitates positive development beyond basic secure attachment.
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Useful for:
- Metacognition
- Dating Issues
- Confidence & Exploration
- Self Definition / Agency / Esteem
