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Biology, Evolution, and Love

I watched “My Octopus Teacher” last night. It was so moving. John Bowlby theorized that Humans like other primates and mammals seek out proximity to the mother for evolutionary reasons, namely to seek safety. This makes perfect sense. You can build a theory of love, connection, and affection solely on the basis of the evolutionary benefits of proximity explained by attachment theory. In the film, Craig Foster the main protagonist, states that the highlighted kind of octopus has no relationship with mother or father. They are solitary creatures. The only…

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Some notes on the three insecure attachment styles

Another quick note about how attachment theory “blames the mom” for everything. Yes, that’s true on one level. Mom is usually the primary caregiver. And our attachment conditioning comes mostly from the interactions with the primary caregiver. But, as we discover with meditation there is no self that is apart from others and apart from our conditioning. You parents did the best they could. They only had their conditioning to inform them. They are ultimately blameless. You are no different in any way. This is how compassion is wise and…

Continue ReadingSome notes on the three insecure attachment styles